Feeling fine on a Thursday afternoon

img_4669Listening to classical music and planning upcoming workshops, which always makes me feel extremely, happy, content and fulfilled.

Are you feeling the same way? If so, savor the moment.

If not, what would you have to be doing to feel the same way?

  • Hold that picture in your mind, breathe deeply and exhale slowly through your nose.
  • Hold it a bit longer, add a few more details, breathe a bit deeper, exhale even more slowly.
  • Gently let the vision fade away.
  • Breathe deeply, exhale with a smile.

Feeling relaxed, happy? Hope so!

Hope this moment finds you immersed in your version of wonderful!

 

Do the next right thing

“Do the next right thing.”

This short missive has helped me many times in my life. stepping-stones-763985_960_720When I am feeling confused, overwhelmed, frustrated or lazy and bored, it always gets me moving forward.

You see, I don’t have to have all the answers or figure out a solution. I don’t even have to wonder how or why I got myself into a situation. All I have to do is the next right thing.

Usually when I ask myself what the next right thing is, I think of three or four things that seem right, and then I just pick the one that is most important to me at that moment in my life.

The other day, the next right thing was to write cards to three people I care deeply about and who will be happy to receive a thank-you, get well, or “thinking of you” note in the mail.  Relationships matter a great deal to me, so that was an easy pick over the laundry and dishes that were waiting for me, but until I posed the actual question to myself – the cards and stamps sat on the dining room table.

On a different day, writing a post or sending work emails might get bumped to the front of the line. Or something much more important, such as apologizing to someone, may take top billing. The choice is yours.

Doing the next right thing is an act of faith in yourself and your priorities. It comes from knowing what really matters to you. It is a softer, more flexible type of to-do list. And, if you like checking things off, you can keep on ongoing “ta-da” list handy to write them down as you complete them along with a nice big check mark.

You will feel so good after doing the next right thing, you will be motivated to accomplish more of the items that come to mind. Until, of course, the next right thing to do is to relax, which will be much easier to do, when you know you’ve already done the right thing!

You can do it!

 

 

When bad things have happened

If you have had a traumatic experience, or have avoided dealing with an upsetting topic or situation that has plagued or worried you for years, there is an effective fix that can get you on the road to recovery. It is called expressive writing and works like this:

  1. Commit 20 minutes a day – for 4 consecutive days
  2. Then in a quiet, private place, and write for 20 minutes a day for 4 consecutive days
    • Make it personal and private
    • Ignore grammar and misspellings
    • Be honest – are you happy ,sad, glad, mad or all of the above?
    • Be reflective not corrective (Don’t try to fix what is bothering you but rather write about what is bothering you.)
    • Only write about what you can handle thinking about – sometimes dealing with a fresh hurt or pain is too intense.
  3. Optional step: Write about same topic from the perspective of others involved . . . tricky but helpful, if you choose to do so.

notebook-731212__180Expressive writing is a concrete action, which is a much better way to deal with problems and challenges than ignoring them and ruminating about the dark situations and sides of our lives. For a video about emotional writing, and additional instructions and insights on how to do it, click here.

Research shows that emotional writing may leave you feeling sad immediately after you write (This is similar to how a sad movie might make you feel.), or you may cry while writing; both are normal and okay.  But, if writing  causes you major distress, simply stop and try again at another time when you feel more ready to explore your feelings.

Expressive writing will leave you feeling happier and healthier. Studies show the positive effects can impact immune functions and last for months and maybe even a lifetime, if you continue the writing as needed.

Pick up a pen and paper, find a cozy spot and write to change your life. It’s free, takes very little time, and may reward you with peace of mind and a much more positive perspective on life.

James W Pennebaker, Ph.D., and Professor at University of Texas at Austin is a leader in the research on this topic. Click here to visit his web page and learn more on the topic.

Who are you feeding these days?

wolf-1583203_960_720

 

An elder Cherokee Native American is teaching his grandson about life. “A fight is going on inside me,” he said to the boy.  “It is a terrible fight and it is between two wolves. One is evil – he is anger, envy, sorrow, regret, greed, arrogance, self-pity, guilt, resentment, inferiority, lies, false pride, superiority, and ego.”

 

He continued, “The other is good – he is joy, peace, love, hope, serenity, humility, kindness, benevolence, empathy, generosity, truth, compassion, and faith. The same fight is going on inside you – and inside every other person, too.”

 

wolf-1336213_960_720The young boy thought about it for a minute and then asked his grandfather, “Which wolf will win?”

 

The old Cherokee simply replied, “The one you feed.”

 




Make sure you “feed” what you truly want in your life, because that is what will grow. 

 

Think about what emotions and future you are feeding. And then you can, stop, drop and roll your way into a happier life.

 

Follow love

 

Sunflowers (2)

Follow the love by sharing this post on Facebook with someone to let them know how much they mean to you. It only takes a moment to let someone know you care. Add a line or two about why they mean so much to you. You can’t always be together, but you can let them know just how wonderful you think they are. Share the love!

WTW Dandelion

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For free resources to help you create the life you really want, click here.

Wishful Thinking Works Life Coaching . . . Are you ready? Life could be even better.

“Unwritten”

narrative-794978_960_720
What is missing from the pages of your life?
You can make it appear. Live the words you want written . . .
I am unwritten, can’t read my mind, I’m undefined
I’m just beginning, the pen’s in my hand, ending unplanned Staring at the blank page before you
Open up the dirty window
Let the sun illuminate the words that you could not find Reaching for something in the distance
So close you can almost taste it
Release your inhibitions
Feel the rain on your skin
No one else can feel it for you
Only you can let it in
No one else, no one else
Can speak the words on your lips
Drench yourself in words unspoken
Live your life with arms wide open
Today is where your book begins
The rest is still unwritten

Oh, oh, oh

I break tradition, sometimes my tries, are outside the lines
We’ve been conditioned to not make mistakes, but I can’t live that way

book-657630__180Staring at the blank page before you
Open up the dirty window
Let the sun illuminate the words that you could not find

Reaching for something in the distance
So close you can almost taste it
Release your inhibitions
Feel the rain on your skin
No one else can feel it for you
Only you can let it in
No one else, no one else
Can speak the words on your lips
Drench yourself in words unspoken
Live your life with arms wide open
Today is where your book begins

Feel the rain on your skin
No one else can feel it for you
Only you can let it in
No one else, no one else
Can speak the words on your lips
Drench yourself in words unspoken
Live your life with arms wide open
Today is where your book begins
The rest is still unwritten

Staring at the blank page before you
Open up the dirty window
Let the sun illuminate the words that you could not find

Reaching for something in the distance
So close you can almost taste it
Release your inhibitions
Feel the rain on your skin
No one else can feel it for you
Only you can let it in
No one else, no one else
Can speak the words on your lips
Drench yourself in words unspoken
Live your life with arms wide open
Today is where your book begins

rain woman-1345021_960_720Feel the rain on your skin
No one else can feel it for you
Only you can let it in
No one else, no one else
Can speak the words on your lips
Drench yourself in words unspoken
Live your life with arms wide open
Today is where your book begins
The rest is still unwritten
The rest is still unwritten
The rest is still unwritten

Oh, yeah, yeah

by NATASHA BEDINGFIELD

WTW Dandelion

 “Like” Wishful Thinking Works on Facebook.

For free resources to help you create the life you really want, click here.

Wishful Thinking Works Life Coaching . . . Are you ready? Life could be even better.

Checking-in

Thinking bubble womanDid you enjoy doing what you did today?

One of the best ways to determine whether or not we are living the life we really want, is simply to ask ourselves on a daily basis, did we enjoy doing what we did today?

Was my work fulfilling? Was it fun?

Was being alone or around people where I wanted to be?

Did I act in accordance with what I truly value?

Was I challenged, or happy not to be?

The key is to find your happy zone, compare it to what you’ve got – without beating up on yourself –  and then make the necessary changes to bring it into balance.

I am not suggesting that each and everyday of our lives will be our best or that we will love what we are doing at all times, but their should be a pattern of joy, fulfilment and contentment over a period of time.

If you don’t check-in with yourself, it is easy to be swept up into weeks, months, years and even decades of complacency, disappointment and disillusionment, and over time, it becomes easier and easier to convince yourself that is the way it is supposed to be.

But it is not! Happiness is good. Contentment and peace of mind are where it is at! Joy, a sense of purpose and fulfillment are worth putting in the effort.

Don’t short change yourself or your life. Create the habit of checking-in with yourself. Use a judgement free approach to discover what could make your life better or make it feel like the one you really want. Start by asking yourself:

  • attractive-19161_960_720Is this where I want to be?
  • Was today a good day, and if so, what made it so? What did I like about it?
  • If not, what would I change? What would make me feel better about today?

Always reward yourself for a good day with a smile, an “atta girl” or whatever makes you feel good. On the not-so-good days, find a comforting phrase to take the sting out of any disappointments – “I know today was hard, but I also know you can and will do better.” – using compassion to motivate you to change.  Find the voice that works for you, and don’t be afraid to use it! Words are powerful motivators and positive self-talk is the gift only you can give yourself.

Don’t wait to create change until you are overwhelmed and depressed with the direction your life has taken, start today to make small changes that help you realign your psychic spine! Get in tuned with what you really want, and how you can get there by checking-in.

 

WTW Dandelion

 “Like” Wishful Thinking Works on Facebook.

For free resources to help you create the life you really want, click here.

Wishful Thinking Works Life Coaching . . . Are you ready? Life could be even better.

 

 

 

 

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